I haven't blogged since August!!!

That is crazy! Faith doesn't let me be on the computer much lately, which is actually a good thing - I spend way less time on facebook :-). My laptop is in the kitchen and, unless she is really distracted, she will push at my legs until I get off. And, I have been knitting up a storm for Christmas - I knitted a scarf for everyone in my family in 3 weeks.... ok not a real scarf, just a neckwarmer... but thats 4 neck warmers in barely 3 weeks. And I can't really knit when Faith is awake - so I had to use my only free time during naps and after she went to sleep at night. blech! So glad thats over with.

Faith is 19 months old!! She says about 20 words and she's pretty much potty trained now. At 17 months, after hearing one of my friends with a baby the same age as Faith who didn't do EC talk about starting potty training I was like WHAT? Maybe I should get on the ball here! haha We hadn't been doing much EC, just first thing in the morning and after her nap, and she was wearing cloth diapers throughout the day and would tell us when she peed her in diaper. So I just started putting panties on her and reading her a book on the potty and she took to it immediately! Most of the time we'll go a few days without having a miss and she was telling us when she needed to go, but she's teething now so its kind of iffy but if I remember to take her fairly often she'll hold it. We still do diapers out of the house because it makes me nervous not to, but she stays dry almost all the time anyway.

Oh!!! AND (tmi?) I think I've finally got my period back. yay? Faith still nurses a lot and all night long, but she is starting to eat more solids... somedays lol.

My family came a few days ago and they brought our Christmas presents :) so here are some pictures in no particular order because blogger uploads them in reverse.

a hammock! Its in our bedroom - its so fun and comfy. Oh and her waldorf doll is with her too

my safely rear-facing 19 month old :)

reading with Grandpa

with Aunt Michelle and Aunt Emily

Grandma

a rough day of teething/sickness. Oh our tv is new too! Faith can't turn it off and on anymore because we mounted it on the wall! YAY!

I got an awesome new camera for my birthday! (I'm 23 now! crazy!) I've never had a dSLR before and I'm love love loving it!!! I also bought this awesome kinderpack, its toddler size... ssssooooo great (we haven't been the thriftiest in the last month if you couldn't tell lol!)!! She fell asleep with Gerber's eye in her mouth. Anyone else watch Gerber as a child?

We love to go on walks... except not so much when its freezing.

Picture Post: 15 months old, Wrap Rant, and some DIY

First off- I highly recommend woven wraps... they are amazing and 100% worth every penny. You can use them from birth to... whenever. There are a ton of different carries you can learn: front, back, hip, nursing- its endless! And, unlike stretchy wraps - they are still super supportive far far far past 15lbs. They have a steep learning curve, but its worth it! I started wrapping when Faith was 5 months old and outgrew the sleepy wrap. Anyway, on with the show! This is Anna she is made by Storchenwiege and this is how we used her today...

...For a 3 hour nap. She is still sleeping actually and I'm very comfortable. This is in a reinforced rucksack carry which I just tried today and I love it. Faith doesn't nurse to sleep very often anymore, but she likes to be wrapped to sleep, sometimes I take her off after she falls asleep, sometimes not.

as a hammock

She loved it!

I left her alone with this book for 5 minutes and she ate the entire corner off... she was suspiciously quiet, no wonder.

She loves to put our shoes on. :-D

Mmmm meatballs

Isn't this so cute?! She is smelling my wilted basil plant!

Family picture via self-timer. haha. use your mind to crop out Mike's feet. Faith is nursing, isn't she giant?

DIY shape sorter. We're only sorting one shape obviously, and she still just tries to shove it through. I think circles would have been the smarter option...

tape a cardboard box closed, cut shapes out of the top, make a hole in the side to retrieve "shapes", cover sides of openings using duct tape to make the edges not so sharp, use glue gun or fabric glue to attach scrap fabric to box. Viola!

DIY Babywearing sweater!

You need a stretchy knit sweater with zipper (buttons would work too)... hold on, I have to tell you about this sweater. It's from Anthropology and I found it at Goodwill with the $90 price tag still attached!!! LOVE! Ok, so baby on your back, put it on backwards and have someone zip you up! HAHAHA. Don't worry, I only go on walks after dark like this...

She is 15 months old now. Weighs 22 lbs (she weighed like 20lbs at 7 months so she has really slowed down the weight gain) and is 31" tall. She says ball, dog, mama, dada, down (I think), and no. She LOVES going to the play area at the mall, you know, the germ infested place you swore you would never allow your child to play at before you had kids (no? just me then?). We have to wait until after 8pm to go because its less crowded then and she really likes to climb up/slide down this one slide over and over again. Its fun to watch.

This is our new house :). Having our stuff split between the two levels is hard... I'm still getting used to it and trying to figure out how to make it practical. ugh. I like the space though, a lot!

the end.

Church Nurseries

Today we visited a different church. One with a nursery. It wasn't like a real church nursery, no one demanded I hand my baby over or assigned security bracelets or parent pagers... just a room with toys and an adult assigned to help in it. I thought maybe it would be good, I would get to listen to the sermon finally, Faith would play. Great.

Well, maybe I should start with the fact that I haven't really sat in church for a year. I sit out in the hall with Faith, since our normal church doesn't have a nursery. I liked this fact for a while, but now that she is getting older and just wants to play - I see their purpose. I've also only left her in the care of others once. I had a dentist appointment and was gone for 2 hours when she was 5 months old.... bad bad bad decision she was one very sad baby when I got back and didn't stop crying for 30 more minutes! Mike takes off work for my dentist appointments now ;-)

So, we try out this other church. I go sit back in the nursery with her for 20 minutes, she is playing and interested in toys so I sneak out - back in to the service. But all I can think about is what she is doing back there... is she sad? Does she miss me? Does she know I'm gone? Is she playing with the balls? What are the adults doing in there? Did they do background checks? I might as well be back there with her, because I'm getting nothing from being out here! So after 4 minutes I hear crying. I go back there and sure enough- crying hysterically, splotchy face, hyperventilating... that's my daughter! AHHHH so sad. So... all this to say, I won't be leaving Faith in a nursery again and I'm glad to know that I'm not missing out on anything by our church not having one.

Off-topic: what would you say to someone who asks you when you're going to have another baby when you want one right now but you haven't ovulated in 2 years? haha, pretty specific, right? I should say something like "In God's timing" but I usually say "whenever" to stop myself from saying "ask my ovaries %*#(@!!" UGH I just hate getting that question!

BoBB

The Business of Being Born is a great documentary on birth and the state of maternity care in America. If you plan on maybe, possibly, ever being a Mother or Father you need to watch this movie. And its free... so just do it. In fact, I'll just post the first part here for your convenience. Who knows how long this will be available on youtube, but you can watch it as an instant on netflix if you are so privileged.

I miss blogging

I haven't been on here in a few weeks. We made it home from Pennsylvania.... eventfully to say the least. Our car overheated on the way there, we barely made it there in time after getting completely drenched in a freak, 5 minute, thunder storm while switching our bags from one car to the other. We were almost charged a seat for Faith since we didn't have her birth certificate (what is up with southwest? They are the only ones to ask for this! Then they said that I should have faxed it to myself while I was on my trip... what?!). Then security has to throw away my new natural, etsy sunscreen because I forgot it was in my purse. We sit on the runway for an hour because of weather while the guy behind us is saying "da plane boss da plane" to his 3 year old over and over again. Faith fell asleep mid-flight, about 30min into her nap she starts crying unconsolably in her sleep and vomits all over me.

I hate New York now. Not fun with a baby in the summer at all. Its too hot to wear her and too difficult to use the stroller with the subway, so we did a bit of both. On the 5 hour drive back from new york Faith was hysterically crying a good portion of the time. I never know what to do when she is like that... I tried nursing her in her carseat, distracting her, nothing. She just wanted OUT. I'd let her out for a few minutes and put her back in, which only made it worse. I just kept thinking... would you rather have a dead baby or a sad baby? I confess, let her out... I know, bad, very bad, mommy. But, we still had over an hour to drive and she was way too upset to fall asleep, even after I let her out she cried for a good 20 minutes after because she was ssoooo scared. Poor girl, thanks Jesus for keeping her safe.

We got a poodle puppy! Then Michael decided he didn't like dogs after all, so we gave him back after a week. It was bitter sweet because... I don't know why anyone ever gets a puppy. It was SO hard with puppy & Faith. oh my. I'm very relieved, but kind of sad at the same time. I really had no time to do anything at all! It was miserable, now my plants are dying because I forgot to water them for 5 days in a row. I'm sure it would have changed once he wasn't a puppy anymore... but that could last 2 years! I really just wish we could go get a shelter dog, but we can't handle shedding and Michael is allergic to some dogs it seems. And I'm definitely not getting another dog until Faith is like 6... and I'll have 10 kids by then, so they can all take care of it. hahaha jk (about the 10 kids part)

We are moving! Did I tell you that? Michael's supervisor is leaving and we can take his house! Its two stories with carpet and a fenced yard. 3bedroom, 2.5baths, more open floor plan so the kitchen isn't secluded in a little hallway (which I HATE about this house). Its about the same size as our house now, except more living space because right now - half our house is the basement which I don't like. I LOVE moving! Organizing, planning, arranging. AHHH I could do it once a year for the rest of my life. lol This will be our 3rd house in 2.5 years on the same base (the other move wasn't by choice though).

My family is coming to visit in a week! They haven't been here since last summer when Faith was 1 month old (we have visited them since then, though). That will be fun, pretty sure my sisters hate me now that we don't have a puppy though.

Michael made "Below the Zone". So, he gets to rank up 6 months sooner than expected - so its basically like winning $800! Woo!

"Vacation"

We are on "Vacation" right now... whatever that means after you have a child. It is SO exhausting chasing a one year old around a non-baby proof house. There are 7 other people here and they of course offer to follow her around, but you know, they get distracted or something and next thing you know she is putting a whole grape in her mouth or trying to climb up the stairs in the blink of an eye. Not to mention- I HATE old houses that have no carpeting and creaky floors. Seriously, could the sound travel any better? If people are talking downstairs it sounds like they are right out in the hall. Needless to say- Faith is having a hard time napping/falling asleep and I'm having a hard time not being mad at everything. hmmmm 11 more days. I am looking forward to seeing some of Mike's family that we haven't seen in 3 years and his parents live in the town where we met, so its fun being back here and going back to all the places we would hang out at. Its the cutest little town ever, with a ton of family owned businesses and row houses. ahhh, adorable. And we are going to NYC tomorrow-Sunday so that will be fun and hopefully not too hot. I'm not even going to bring the stroller because subway = not handicap accessible.. meaning lots of stairs. And its crowded! (we have been using the stroller more because it is HOT to have a baby on your back in the summer)

And... everyone and there dog is pregnant and I'm not and I wish I was but I'm not even fertile yet (no signs of it at least). My heart aches every time I see a newborn... so I just try to remind myself how many people struggle with true infertility (not breastfeeding induced infertility lol). I guess I'm just freaked out now that I will never be able to get pregnant while breastfeeding and Faith will be 4 by the time we have another baby. lol. Yet just a few months ago I was freaked out I would get pregnant too soon. I SO do not trust God... :( its always something I'm worried about. Not even worried, I just WANT! Maybe if Faith is a little older though, I'll be able to tandem nurse and she won't wean during my pregnancy! fun! God knows what He's doing.... my body knows what its doing. words to remember. I have been having a ton of dreams lately like when I was pregnant. hmmm

sorry to be such a complainer...

Growing Kids GODS Way? Are you sure?

a couple highlights from this very indepth article on the Cultic Characteristics of Growing Families International/Ezzos. I strongly encourage reading the whole article if you are involved/interested in this "ministry"/program. And now, from the people that brought you Babywise!

Note that the indispensable and exclusive role of the blood of Christ in removing the guilt of sin (Heb. 9:14, 22; 1 John 1:7) is not mentioned. Neither are parents instructed to teach their children that their guilty consciences can be absolved only by accepting Jesus as their Savior and then regularly confessing their sins to God (1 John 1:9). Surely the Ezzos do not believe chastisement is the price paid to remove the guilt of a child’s sin in the sight of God. It seems more than coincidental, however, that they failed to qualify such a potentially misleading assertion.

"repeatedly cited Matthew 27:46 — ‘…My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?’ — in support of their teaching that mothers should refuse to attend crying infants who have already been fed, changed, and had their basic needs met. ‘Praise God,’ writes Gary Ezzo on page 122 ofPreparation for Parenting, ‘that the Father did not intervene when His son cried out on the cross.’ We see no way to make such an application of this verse without completely disregarding its original context and purpose."^{30 they teach that maternal instinct is an unbiblical concept and therefore imply mothers should ignore any intuitive alarms they may hear when following the GFI program (e.g., to pick up their crying babies when the program would tell them to let the babies cry).}

While GFI takes Scripture out of context to prove that some of its teachings are from God, it does not shy away from according a similar divine status to other teachings that clearly have no biblical support whatsoever. On the one hand, GFI materials acknowledge that "God is silent on the topic of infant feeding"³⁸ and that "the Bible is not specific" on how to "produce a morally responsible child."³⁹ On the other hand, their infant care book is subtitled "God’s Order for your Baby’s Day" and their child-rearing book is titled "Growing Kids God’s Way." Contrary views — even those advanced by Christians — are labeled non-Christian.⁴⁰ The overriding tone of the books is dogmatic and authoritative. They are full of feeding, sleeping, and playtime schedules and rules and "non-negotiable mandates"⁴¹ for parents to follow. Issues that the Bible is silent on and that Christians generally consider matters of convenience or personal or cultural preference become matters of Christian morality: how well a child sleeps is discussed in terms of the parents’ spirituality;⁴² directing a pretoddler’s behavior in the high chair is called "moral training";⁴³ an appendix in Growing Kids God’s Way teaches that a child’s behavior at the table is "an extension of Christian character."⁴⁴

the Ezzos have said there is "no basis"⁴⁹ for the concerns and have dismissed them as "unsubstantiated hearsay."⁵⁰ The infant program they developed warns parents of the dangers of demand feeding,⁵¹ the infant feeding practice strongly recommended by the American Academy of Pediatrics.⁵² GFI describes the research supporting putting infants to sleep on their backs as "not conclusive, and the method of gathering supportive data questionable"⁵³ — despite the fact there has been no less than a 30 percent drop in the number of sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS) deaths in the United States since the "Back to Sleep" campaign began.⁵⁴

The Ezzos describe themselves as "professionals"⁵⁵ and have said they are replacing others as the "authority" on child-rearing.⁵⁶ Yet they lack much of the background experience and education found in many of the very critics they are dismissing.⁵⁷ They have claimed to have a "network" of "hundreds of pediatricians" who provide them with "expert medical advice,"⁵⁸ but they have refused to provide the list when asked.⁵⁹ There is not one Internationally Board Certified Lactation Consultant on staff, though the materials give explicit breast-feeding instruction. These paradoxes may exist partly because of the Ezzos’ apparent lack of any true accountability to either church elders or a board of directors⁶⁰ and also because they actively discourage questioning both inside and outside the GFI system.

the book also instructs that even a two-week-old baby who falls asleep during the middle of a feeding and wakes up hungry two hours later should not be fed: "Babies learn very quickly the laws of natural consequences. If he does not eat at one feeding, then make him wait until the next one….Do not feed him between routine mealtimes."¹⁰¹ Lactation experts disagree. Pediatrician Marianne Neifert, author of the "Dr. Mom" parenting books, says, "Some babies…could handle the schedule. But a small baby with a mother who’s got a marginal milk supply.…Those babies could be put in jeopardy on a schedule."¹⁰² Lactation experts cite research explaining why such a schedule works for some babies, but not for others.¹⁰³

Things I would do differently

... at Faith's birth that I never thought of.

Ask what my care provider does in cases of emergency (hemorrhaging, shoulder dystocia, etc). I of course asked all the usual - csection rates, episiotomy, induction, cord around neck etc etc. But I neglected to ask about certain things that might come up during labor and it kind of bit me in the butt as I wasn't thrilled with the way a couple things were handled.

Insist on skin to skin for a longer period of time. Sure, we had like 20 or 30 minutes before she was weighed & measured and swaddled (and we probably only had that since I was totally naked, otherwise I would have had a gown on). But, after my SIL had issues with her newest baby not latching at all and after doing some research for her- turns out skin to skin is MIGHTY important for breastfeeding.

Don't shower at the hospital... worst shower of my life.

Have someone take pictures... we have no labor pictures and I'm so sad.

I might not take evening primrose oil, even though I think it did help in some aspects- my sister said it could cause hemorrhaging.

Insist on delivering placenta while cord still intact - I wasn't really clear on this and decided to just have a see what happens attitude, and since I was hemorrhaging they cut it early... they did ask me first though. But who is thinking clearly the second after your baby is born?

I don't think we will find out the sex next time. yay!

Overall I was VERY pleased with my hospital experience. The nurse I had was great and never once asked me if I wanted pain meds. And my midwife was there with me the whole time. Everyone was very chill (except when her shoulders got stuck). After she was born they pretty much left us alone (except one nurse kept telling me I wanted tylenol... I didn't - I wasn't in pain. No wonder though, they charge $3/pill!). I really reallly loved the "room service" and not having to cook or do dishes or rely on the kindness of others to bring us a hot meal. In fact- thats one of my motivating factors to go back next time lol. And I've heard the other midwife that also delivers there does "under the table waterbirths"- you aren't supposed to, but she says she won't force you out of the tub lol. And my MW was totally fine with delivering Faith on the toilet lol (never did because I found a more comfortable position, though it wasn't the best for gravity or stuck shoulders). No one pressured us to do any routine newborn things (baths, eye ointment, hepb, etc). I did feel pressure for the vit.k since she had some bruising but we just had to sign something for it.

But, what about next time? Then what will we do with Faith? I don't think they allow young siblings at birth in the hospital. There is a free standing birth center an hour away that our insurance pays for... but an hour away. And homebirth of course would always be my first choice but free or $2000... free... $2000? Its not even that we can't afford $2000... but its FREE at the hospital. Our insurance does pay for homebirth with a CNM but all the ones here are CPM or RM. I did call someone who said our insurance covered her fees, but only because they had her listed as CNM (she was a cpm) and they have a database online of their "preferred providers" she said that she wasn't listed on that for some strange reason and she required payment up front and she would reimburse you when/if the insurance paid her (which is standard). Shady much?

Can't I just pay a midwife like $200 to show up last minute in case anything goes awry... not even to deliver the baby- Michael could do that. lol ;-)

I don't even know why I'm blogging about this. Looking forward to next time I suppose. Michael has been saying Faith needs a baby brother/sister for about 8 months now lol. Still no period though woooohoo 21 months so far.

some links on spanking

Is Spanking Biblical? This is probably the best article I have read! So much information!

And this awesome book is online again!! Samuel Martin "Thy Rod and Thy Staff"

Kevin Swanson (who is NOT anti-spanking) speaks out against the dangers of Michael and Debi Pearl (though they aren't mentioned by name) . This REALLY surprised me! I'm so glad to hear someone in the homeschool community taking a stand!

Please, I don't want to debate with anyone or make anyone feel judged for their choices.

wearing skirts

I was talking with my neighbor (who homeschools and is super cool) about "those homeschoolers". you know the ones... anyway I started thinking about women who only wear skirts & dresses. I used to be one of them. I fully believed the only way to dress completely modestly & femininely was to wear skirts and dresses (like- we went to Rome and I didn't put a pair of pants on the entire trip - in DECEMBER). Let me just tell you how big of a head I got about it. I would look at all the other women at the store, or wherever, and think how I was the only one wearing a skirt and how I was such a God-honoring example of womanhood and everyone else was misled or feminists. I don't think this is how all the "dress-only" women are, but I can definitely see how it can happen with the mindset. *don't worry some of you that I know now... my judgmental dress-only philosophy didn't last that long* lol

And, who decided that pants were immodest, feminist attire? I mean, sure they weren't marketed with the homemaker as the original target audience and men wore them first. But, so what?

Anyone heard of the "Feelin' Feminine Challenge"? Its a blog challenge to only wear skirts for 1 week and to blog about how you feel and are treated whilst participating. I've considered doing it. Maybe I still will... I like wearing skirts sometimes (I have a whole closet full). I do feel prettier and more feminine when I do. BUT I feel like I can't do anything while I'm wearing a skirt... and I have to get up and down off the floor a lot and stepping all over a skirt while trying to stand up and hold a baby is not fun, feminine, graceful, or safe. And going up and down the stairs while carrying something? not so much. I guess it would depend on skirt length. Hmmm... the more I think about it the more I think pants are the homemaker's best friend! So free-ing. I guess I'm just one of those people who doesn't like to have to think about my clothes after I put them on in the morning. And maybe I have weird sensory issues, but I hate HATE getting into/out of the car in a skirt... its just feels... icky? And, I think Mike likes me better when I remind him of the girl he met at wal-mart in jeans (more on that later) than a bent-out-of-shape prairie girl who wears skirts all the time.

If you are a skirt/dress only woman... I think you are super cute and i secretly probably envy you

I was on the receiving end of this judgment recently- except much more blatantly than I ever was about skirts. It was about homebirth/hospital birth. the superiority tone and condescension was astounding. I even apologized to my sister after that (who was not involved in the discussion at all) because she is always telling me how judgmental I am. It really turned me off to all things homebirth for a while. And I was actually glad I had a hospital birth after that so I could keep a sliver of humility (even though I would love a homebirth more than anything, I don't think its in the cards for us).

its a lot harder to find time to blog when you only have a desktop computer. (Faith broke our laptop- its getting repaired now and was still under warranty YAY)

Its been a while

Been a while since I posted something, huh? Things have been crazy lately - my grandpa died last month. He was 97. I had gone to visit my family early in March when my sisters' had spring break. The day before I got there the doctor put my grandpa back on hospice and the day after I got there he went to the hospital. I did get to see him for a few minutes the day we got there. They found out he had contracted RSV so I couldn't see him in the hospital. I only got to see my mom for a few hours. It was sad. He died a week and a half later . I didn't think I would be able to go back because plane tickets would be so expensive, but amazingly it was only $99, booking 2 days in advance! I actually laughed when I first saw the price because I thought it said 1,000 instead of $112 or whatever it was. You can see pictures of my grandpa's life here. I'm going to miss him... but he loved the Lord, so we know where he is. :-)

YAY so Faith and I got to go back to Wichita and just our luck she got the worst cold the day before we were supposed to fly. She had 102deg. armpit temp and refused to nurse for 18 hours and just wanted to lay her head on my chest all.day.long. It was sooo sad. I thought she had been sick before - it was nothing compared to this. all the doctor gave me was cough medicine with codeine and tylenol. My friend suggested the chiropractor, so out of desperation I took her. Right after that started the 18 hours of not nursing so I was pretty mad at the Chiropractor... but in the morning (the day of flying) she was almost 100% better. No fever, she was nursing like normal and even wanted to get off my lap for a little bit!

She did ok on the planes... twice we had the seat next to us empty and twice we had someone sitting next to us. Yikes is it hard to contain a curious baby to 10 inches of space, but luckily she slept through at least 1/2 of every flight.

Faith is almost 11 months old now!!! She has been walking since 9.5 months and rarely crawls anymore. And just recently (yesterday) started wanting/eating solids. I'm a little sad about it actually. I'll give her a piece of food from my plate and she will eat it off my finger, then walk around in a circle and come back for more (if she isn't in her high chair, which is most of the time). She is so funny. She has 6 teeth... and I think she is about to get 2 more, which would make it 6 on top and 2 on the bottom. haha

we have been going to two churches since november. One is on Saturday and one is on Sunday. It's a little tiring. The one on Saturday is a "Sabbath Fellowship"... torah observant, Messianic. We like it, but its like 2.5 hours long and there isn't any space to walk around with a baby without everyone hearing/seeing you, so its stressful... very stressful. The one on Sunday is a family-integrated church and we have gone there for over a year and I love it... well, I basically just talk in the "nursing circle" out in the hall for the entire service. And no one is really our age, but all the kids our age go to those rock concert churches ;-) (not a big deal to me, but guys are different. I think Mike wants to find another video-game & football loving father. haha) Plus, I really like the fact that we are all "forced" to sit in the hall with our noisy babies and chat instead of putting them in a nursery and be able to listen to the sermon (bec. rock concert churches have nurseries lol). Does this even make sense? I need to go to bed. nothing against rock concert churches in general, if thats your thing.

Oh, and Faith broke our laptop. In a moment of weakness (or distraction), Mike was letting her bang on the keyboard. When I get on it the screen is froze and its making a clicking sound. I turn it off and back on - nothin'. Luckily we still have it under warranty. Its probably the hard-drive. Which means we lose everything, but I think its all either on this computer or still on the camera (because all I ever do is upload pictures).

Oh oh, and my younger sister is getting married in Jan I think. Its weird, even though by then she will be a year older than I was when I got married. She is in nursing school right now.

Speaking of "nursing" school -hahaha. I'm applying to be a LLL Leader. yup. I love LLL. I'm excited!

Faithers Day Parade

One of her many nicknames... it was close to Father's Day and there was a mispelling in an email.

I started a journal for Faith. My sister bought it for me for Christmas and I figured if I write 1 page a month I can do it until she is like 20... I'm already behind and it's only the second month. So while I'm stuck here on the couch under a sleeping baby with one free hand- I thought I'd type it on here so I won't forget some of the things she is doing.

She starts tugging on her diaper, trying to pull off the velcro, if she peed in it.

She says mamamama if she is tired and hungry.

She only walks at night when daddy is home.

She loves drinking water out of our water bottles, even if it makes her choke.

I think she may be doing the sign for milk.

I'm super lazy about giving her solids (like once a week) and I hate putting her in her high chair, it just seems like such a hassle. Its okay though, she doesn't really NEED solids yet.

She is 9.5 months, weighs 21lbs I think and wears size 12 - 18months.

She slept through the night without nursing at all for the first time the other night... I kept waking up, trying to get her to nurse and she would latch on for 5 seconds then pull off and roll away. She was sick though and couldn't breathe very well, so I think thats why.

She still takes 3 naps/day. 2 long ones during the day and a short one at night. And nurses before, during, and after all sleeping. :-)

She likes to play in the fridge, pull things out of cabinets/drawers/bookshelves... basically play with anything but her toys.

SO SAD!

This is very sad. Another (a 4 year old boy was murdered 4 years ago also) death by beating by a follower of the Pearls.

"the evidence suggests 7-year-old Lydia Schatz was being disciplined "for hours" prior to the 911 call for mis-pronouncing a word during a home-school reading lesson. When police searched the family's Crestwood Drive residence, they took a photograph of a 15-inch length of tubing lying on the parents' bed next to a children's book about a frog and a toad, which Ramsey said the girl had been reading from."

Pregnancy/birth links

Pregnancy/Birth

Shape of a Mother - warning nudity... boobs and stretch marks, etc

Lotus Birth - we didn't do this, but I thought about it.

Unassisted Birth - I don't know how I feel about this...

Baby Names- the best website!!

Yoga during Labor - didn't do this either...

Placenta Prints - I think this is the coolest thing EVER! It makes a really neat picture, wish I had done it.

Guide to intact perineum

Spinning Babies - I did this when I found out Faith was posterior. She turned...

Weston A Price diet for preg/nursing moms

birth plan

rethinking circumcision

The Bible and Circumcision

Birth as a bowel movement - a great way to think about it!

Safety of U/S - I haven't read this...

Ina May Gaskin - LOVE HER

links, links, links

ya know, I could have just added these in the side bar divided into sections... that would have been smarter. oh well, maybe tomorrow... or today depending on how long Faith sleeps.

Also, my dentist just called to confirm my appointment for tomorrow. I never made an appt for tomorrow. I asked what it was for and she said fillings. Last time I was there (2 weeks ago) I made it a point to ask if that was my last filling and it was. She said I had 3 more tomorrow and that she had quoted me a price of $58. I'm positive they must have scheduled it under my name on accident because if I was having 3 fillings it would cost like $120. Plus, I make it a point to schedule on government holidays so Mike can watch her. so, yeah, weird. she canceled it, but I bet the person will show up tomorrow.

one more babywearing because I just found it today

ethnic babywearing photos - beautiful!

PARENTING - yikes this is a big category

Science of Crying-it-out

10 reasons not to hit your child - Dr. Sears

Gentle Christian Mothers - fav. website EVER

To Train Up A Child - quotes from the book

Parenting Freedom - this website has EVERYTHING!

Mercola - shunning the family bed you might have to enter your email address to read it.

Harvard research on co-sleeping

Stress in infancy

A Parenting Experiment to try before doing Babywise - interesting. This website also has a neat magazine that I want a subscription to.

Time to Abolish Cribs?

Evaluating Ezzo's logic - this is great, very in depth.

Sleep Training Research

Co-Sleeping & SIDS fact sheet

Articles on Sleep

Study on Corporal Punishment - I haven't read this, it looks long...

10 Reasons not to use a pacifier - I like this!

Pygmy Model for Relations - one of my FAV articles. I only wish they were Christian.

Motherhood Bliss - a great article for Christian mothers.

Confessions of Failed Babywiser

next up... BIRTH!!!

Links...again

Case for Cue-Feeding - great article

Watch Your Language - article on how language affects breast/formula perceptions

Canned vs. Formula

Lact-Aid - if you "don't make enough milk"

Natural age of weaning - I'll give you a hint, its not 12 months ;-)

Potential danger of bag-slings - those slingriders you can buy from walmart... aka "I carry my baby in a duffle bag."

Walters Organics Wrap - this is apparently an amazing wrap and cheap too, I heard it referred to as the "Poor man's Pamir" which is a VERY expensive (like $800+), hard to find wrap.

Incase I ever want to dye a wrap

babywearing tutorials

mei tai with interchangeable panel - the first MT I made... not the best, but its fun with the panels

pouch sling - with video!!! This takes like 10 minutes

DIY wrap - I haven't done this yet, but I've heard wonderful things about Osnaburg fabric as a wrap.

Scandi Mei Tai - my fav. that I've made. super comfy, but the hood on this one is super small and useless

BW poncho

hood to headrest MT - this looks amazing, but I haven't gotten around to making it yet

can you tell I'm getting sick of this yet?

Link of the Day!!!

DIY nursing cover! SO EASY!

10 ways to use breastmilk ;-)

The Babywearer - amazing!!!

Link of the Day!!!

to finish off the "cool baby things" folder...

17 tips for feeding toddlers

List of childrens books showing breast feeding - not bottle feeding

AP clothing I really want the "I'd like my future Husband intact" for Faith. how cute!

next up "bf/babywearing" surprise surprise.

Link of the Day!!!

More than one today, because they are all from the same awesome website (that I had forgotten about until I was looking through my links!)

Baby-led solids This is what we do for solids

Elimination Communication - Everyone should at least TRY it!

Link of the Day!!!

I have way, way too many links saved on this computer and they will be lost forever if I don't save them in some way (which has happened one too many times with other computers). And so starts my "Link-of-the-Day". Lets see how long I can keep this up....

Todays link is from the "cool baby things" folder

Kanoe baby hammock! I think this thing is totally awesome and I want to sleep in one!!! Its like $300 though and cosleeping is free! ;-)

8 months old

Faith is 8 months old yesterday! I can hardly believe it. She is getting so big and can even stand on her own for a few seconds. These are some of the pictures we had taken on our trip to Kansas last month.

the spacing of children

I have been thinking about this A LOT lately (I wrote this a month ago and am just now posting it...). I'm totally freaked out about getting pregnant now. Know how I just made that post about trusting God with our family size? Yeah well, since then, I'm really worried about it and not because I would be overwhelmed or finances or anything like that... but because I don't want to sabotage breastfeeding for her! I haven't gotten my period back (YAY its been 18 months since I've had one!), but if that happened, I might lose it! Because one usually loses their milk supply during pregnancy (at some point... be it 5 weeks or 35 weeks. and I say usually because a few will only notice a temporary decrease). And, my breastfeeding goal was at least 2 years, but, there is a chance that she would wean once I got pregnant even if she was past 12 months.

I don't know if I'm making an idol (so to speak) out of breastfeeding... but I really think it would be unfair to her if I were to loose my milk supply and have to switch to formula. I don't want to feed my baby chemicals!!! But, then I think about the other baby we would be having (hypothetically) and how I would love it too and ugh. I'm just so confused now.

This all started by the way, at a LLL meeting when someone was newly pregnant with a 7 month old and was asking about tandem nursing and the leader told her most women would have to supplement with a young baby. I LOVE LLL by the way... I go to 2 meetings a month! lol I'm thinking about becoming a leader... I don't really know, I'm not a leader at all, soooo yeah.

We do ecological breastfeeding, which is doing things like not using bottles, pacifiers or cribs and, on average, fertility doesn't return until 14 months postpartum (but that varies greatly... but it is like 98% infertility in the first 6 months or something close to that and then slowly decreases the older the baby). We were already doing most of the "standards" and infertility was just a bonus (I still don't do the napping thing... I probably should, but I have trouble falling asleep). And, it may sound, to some, like not trusting God. I was reading online someone said that they didn't do EBF because they didn't want to do ANYTHING that would prevent a child from being conceived and someone responded and said but, by not doing it you are unnaturally inducing ovulation. hmm interesting thoughts. yes. Not that there is anything wrong with pacifiers or bottles (well, sometimes there is when they cause nipple confusion and I just don't like the idea of a "mama substitute"), but if you are a person of the "quiver-full" mindset, then doesn't it make sense to only use things the Lord gave you for your baby?

So, I was thinking (and talking with Mike) if we would just do NFP again (if my period came back before 12 months or if Faith still wasn't eating a lot of solids after 12 months). Then I started thinking about NFP and how God designed us to know our fertility. Why would He do that? Why would he gives us signs to know when we are fertile or not? To tempt us into using that knowledge for evil? I don't think so... He could have made it so woman got pregnant no matter the time of month. Though... in the Old Testament (someone correct me if I'm wrong), he commands husband/wife to abstain during the menstrual period and for 7 days after, which would put it (on average) right at the time of ovulation. Obviously he wanted them making some babies. But, really how "natural" is it to abstain during ovulation, since its the most "sexually driven" (sorry, couldn't come up with a more pleasant term lol) time of the month? I don't know... I don't know... I don't know...

I probably don't even need to worry about this since she hardly eats any solids and nurses all the time still. And, even if I did get pregnant and my milk dried up I can still bond with her in all the other ways I do now. Maybe it wouldn't be a fate worse than death... anyone want to be a wetnurse? ;-)

Resolutions

Every year I make 10 and it has to be done by midnight New Years Eve... I don't know why 10. But, its a nice even number. I have them dating back to '95 (I was 8). I especially love the ones like "make my bed" "wash my own clothes" (that one took until I was 18) "save money for Hanson fan club" "buy more N*SYNC cds" and "don't kiss so many boys"... not all from the same year. Every year I have something about the Bible... it started out as "Read the whole Bible" to "Read the Bible everyday" to this year "Bible". I even came up with a schedule this year for projects to do and books to read in what month so I actually get them done/read... maybe.

We got pictures taken in Wichita when we were visiting my parents.... I'll put them up soon.

Also... an addendum coming for that post about children.